How do I know if I'm transgender?
This question is probably the one I get most often, but being trans or changing your gender expression is not really an either-or proposition. It’s something you can kind of explore and see where it takes you.
If you have questions about your identity, or if you’re uncomfortable with the way you’re expressing yourself in the world, just change it and see what happens. A long time before I decided to medically transition, I was doing things like painting my nails, removing body hair, switching up my style, wearing different colors. Every time there’s this opportunity to be like “is this me”?
You make little changes to yourself and your life and then you see where you end up. I think that’s a lot easier for folks than telling them to go on a spiritual retreat and find the answer to all their struggles. You won’t.
Transitioning did not solve all my problems. Transitioning gave me problems that I consider more interesting, and it made them feel worth solving.
So if you’re in a place now - like I was - where the only question going on in your brain is “am I trans, am I trans, what would that mean for my life,” just take those little steps and see if it quiets that question.
Do you hate the way your beard hair feels? Go get it lasered. Are you uncomfortable with your balding? Talk to your doctor about that.
There are so many things you can do to alter your body before getting to a point of something like hormones or surgeries, but it’s also important to remember that a lot of cis folks also use hormones and surgeries to make their bodies more comfortable for them.
We only get one life and we only get and if you’re not careful that can pass in the blink of an eye. None of us are getting any younger, and it’s important not to let your fear of what other people might think of you hold you back.
The people who you really want to surround yourself with are the people who are going to be comfortable with you expressing yourself in a way that’s comfortable for you.
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